Fauxbriety

On behalf of a girlfriend who I love and who will remain nameless, I just coined a new word: fauxbriety.

Definition: "Even though I'm swerving all over the road and catapulting my car over snowbanks, I swear I haven't had a drink in weeks."

She claims it was a combination of cold medicine and queasiness so, unless it happens again, I'll have to take her word for it. To the best of my knowledge, it's never happened before so the benefit of the doubt seems to be in order here. In the meantime, I simply plan to stay clear of her car.

Taxi!

Update: So much for being proud of myself. I just Googled my new word and it's been on Urban Dictionary since 2008. Darn it all.