Friday, November 18, 2011

All in a Day's Work

There's nothing I love more when trying to work than listening to the radio, the sound of hammering, and painters who are refurbishing my old space for the new tenants talking about how girls have gotten hotter since they graduated from high school (but they themselves haven’t changed much).

Landlord? Check please.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

You Can Tuna Piano

Do you know what doesn't match a grey, pinstripe skirt?

Tuna salad, that's what.

Do you know what you may have to do when you eat lunch in your car?

Stop anywhere immediately off the expressway exit for a new wardrobe, that's what.

In today's case, Kohl's. No, I don't want a credit card. No, I don't want to be on your mailing list. I just want a cheap skirt and the ability to get out of here pronto.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Fly the Unfriendly Skies

As a constant living-the-brand fanatic, I have to post about a recent experience on a United Airlines flight from IAD to ORD last Thursday. When I boarded, Maurice -- the famous-in-certain-circles dude from the United safety video (everyone who flies would recognize him, I swear) -- and two of his counterparts were seated in the row immediately in front of me. Even though they were passengers, they all wore their United uniforms complete with yellow striping on the shoulders. Fame in our midst!

At the end of the flight, as we were descending to O'Hare, the father seated next to me pulled a travel bag out from under the seat in front of him, gathered his two little daughters' electronics, dolls and books from across the aisle and started packing. Without prompting, the United employee seated directly in front of him totally freaked out and laid into him about bumping his seat. The dad quietly apologized and explained that he was just trying to pack his kids' stuff before landing. The United employee angrily responded, "Don't hit my seat again."

I was oddly shaken. Sure, I don't know what's going on in this guy's life. Maybe he has long-standing anger management issues or possibly he's just having a difficult time right now.  But a lashing like that from anyone, especially someone in uniform, is totally unmerited.

As we stood to deplane, I fully expected this guy to apologize. Something along the lines of, "I'm really sorry about my outburst. I've had a rough day and didn't mean to take it out on you" would have gone a long way to repairing the incident. Instead, he just walked away. I also hoped that Maurice, a somewhat high profile brand ambassador, would have had the dignity, integrity and chops to speak up.

United breaks more than guitars -- they break all the rules of brand and social etiquette. So much for the Friendly Skies.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Banff Tree Huggers

For a chick who doesn't like the cold, I loooooooooooved my trip to Banff! Total relaxation with girlfriends and 100% stress free. Now, as official tree huggers, it's time to put the log in travelog! 

Day one: I arrived late so we just had time for some shopping in town. Did I mention that town looks like an alpine village? Yodel - Ay - EEE - Oooo



The mountains are everywhere! The next day, we went to yoga (ahhhhh, finally) where the mountains greeted us from the windows of the studio. Then we went for a two hour hike on the Fenland Trail along this stream . . .


 











. . . to the Vermilion Lakes. Did I mention that it was cold? And that we were gone for two hours? It was so amazing.














I'm getting my days mixed up but I'm pretty sure we went for cocktails (I had a pear martini with cranberries floating in it!) and dinner at the Banff Springs Hotel that night. Sher was priddy.














On Day 3, my girlfriend Margaroo and I drove to Lake Louise. We stopped on the way to avoid hitting an elk. (My first elk sighting! Ever!)














At Lake Louise, we stopped to take pictures of the lake and glacier. Please note the mountain on the left . . .















Why? Because we climbed it. We didn't mean to, it just happened when we began following a path that we assumed (incorrectly) wound around the lake. On the way, we were greeted by a friendly woodsman and his wife whose hair was covered in frost and frozen to her face. He warned us of grizzly bears, told us to make a lot of noise but shared that the climb would be worth it.

He was right. The searing pain in the lungs. The way-too-many-to-count stops to catch our breath. The stunning frost covered hair that I would also acquire. All worth it for this view.


As true women of the wild (also known as idiots), we decided to take the path less traveled on our descent. We went down the side of the mountain where we followed a thin, thin track made by possibly two other non-outdoorsy morons. We could have tumbled to our deaths at any moment. At times we slid on our butts to avoid catapulting off an embankment. Yep, sher was priddy.




For Day 4 we have no pictures because we spent the entire day, eight hours!, at the Banff Springs Hotel Spa. We went to yoga (again!), got massages, swam in the lap pool, swam in the outdoors heated pool, went in/out of hot tubs (there were four or five all heated at different temps), rested in the steam room, rested in the dry sauna, rested in the eucalyptus inhalation room, rested and ate lunch in the "relaxation room," and went for a dip in the indoor mineral pool. So indulgent.

On Day 5, my last day, we drove to Invermere, British Columbia. Here we went to the hot springs, of course, where the waters are hot on one side and simply warm on the other.This is the simply warm side.















Since we were at a lower elevation, there was less snow on the ground here but, yikes, there was indeed ice on the deck (as I clearly remember because I had to stand on it to take the above picture).


And, lo and behold, the lifeguards were wearing sweatpants! Yes, sweatpants! Clearly not the best location for a scantily clad David Hasselhoff sighting.














On our way home, we stopped to enjoy the view. Wow, more mountains! Who knew? The only picture we did not take was of the "avalanche warning" sign.


Lastly, we paused briefly over the continental divide. I was in the back seat (i.e., west coast) and Margaret and Brian were in the front seat (i.e., east coast).


Alas, all good things must come to an end. For a brief moment in time, I had heaps of fun in the frigid air of Canada with my girlfriends from Australia and awesome Canadian hubby/kids!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Alone Again (Naturally)

My Myers-Briggs Profile is ENTP. And the E, for extrovert, is a strong E. Ergo, I need people around for energy. Working alone in this office for the next eight months is going to be the death of me. Facebook is my proverbial water cooler. Now, thanks to the hubby, I have a virtual team of supporters to praise me all the livelong day. I only hope they add some of the golden nuggets suggested by my old HR department.















I'm becoming my very own version of Stuart Smalley. I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And doggone it, people like me.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Mountain Mama

Just got back from a glorious trip to Banff where I stayed at a friend's home on the corner of Elk and Squirrel. Seriously. You can't make this stuff up. (There's also Beaver and Cougar but they don't intersect.)

More on my life as a wild mountaineering woman later. For now, I simply bring you Elk and Squirrel.