Photo Per Day #18: Oh Crap!

Last night, six sets of neighbors gathered for our annual gag gift swap. The kids did their secret santas. Son #1 got a GameStop giftcard; Son #2 got an iTunes card along with a bucket of faux snow balls that he loves and continues to chuck at us all day today.

My favorite pic, however, is of my girlfriend's chocolate dip with animal cracker poised atop. Yum? Thank heavens it wasn't steaming . . .

I asked if I could snap a photo. She responded, "If you must." (I must.)

Photo Per Day #12: Ornaments

Tis the season to decorate the Christmas tree. As such, it's that time of the year when I open a box filled with my very own, unique ornaments. Ornaments that my loving friends and family created and hung on the tree at a surprise party for my 30th birthday 17 years ago this month. (Sheesh!) You know that you're loved when everyone, bar one, selected the worst possible pictures of me. (It's really not that hard.) Ornaments of me as a baby with food all over my face. Looking miserable as a kid. Kicking my leg in the air at parties (i.e., knickers shot) as an adult. Holding cocktails at parties. You name it, I have it.

After almost two decades in a box, they're not faring so well so I decided to capture a few on "film." Today's image may explain why I am shorter than the rest of my 6' tall family.

Photo Per Day #4: Keuka Christmas

Spent the night last night at my girlfriend's house on Keuka Lake. We sat in the hot tub for hours and drank a lot of wine. We thought we might go swimming (in December!?) but we all chickened out when we got down to the dock.

Mary's front deck is covered with white Christmas lights . . .















But her tree is not yet adorned.

'Twas very, very peaceful this morning.

Banff Tree Huggers

For a chick who doesn't like the cold, I loooooooooooved my trip to Banff! Total relaxation with girlfriends and 100% stress free. Now, as official tree huggers, it's time to put the log in travelog! 

Day one: I arrived late so we just had time for some shopping in town. Did I mention that town looks like an alpine village? Yodel - Ay - EEE - Oooo

The mountains are everywhere! The next day, we went to yoga (ahhhhh, finally) where the mountains greeted us from the windows of the studio. Then we went for a two hour hike on the Fenland Trail along this stream . . .

 











. . . to the Vermilion Lakes. Did I mention that it was cold? And that we were gone for two hours? It was so amazing.

I'm getting my days mixed up but I'm pretty sure we went for cocktails (I had a pear martini with cranberries floating in it!) and dinner at the Banff Springs Hotel that night. Sher was priddy.

On Day 3, my girlfriend Margaroo and I drove to Lake Louise. We stopped on the way to avoid hitting an elk. (My first elk sighting! Ever!)

At Lake Louise, we stopped to take pictures of the lake and glacier. Please note the mountain on the left . . .

Why? Because we climbed it. We didn't mean to, it just happened when we began following a path that we assumed (incorrectly) wound around the lake. On the way, we were greeted by a friendly woodsman and his wife whose hair was covered in frost and frozen to her face. He warned us of grizzly bears, told us to make a lot of noise but shared that the climb would be worth it.

He was right. The searing pain in the lungs. The way-too-many-to-count stops to catch our breath. The stunning frost covered hair that I would also acquire. All worth it for this view.

As true women of the wild (also known as idiots), we decided to take the path less traveled on our descent. We went down the side of the mountain where we followed a thin, thin track made by possibly two other non-outdoorsy morons. We could have tumbled to our deaths at any moment. At times we slid on our butts to avoid catapulting off an embankment. Yep, sher was priddy.

For Day 4 we have no pictures because we spent the entire day, eight hours!, at the Banff Springs Hotel Spa. We went to yoga (again!), got massages, swam in the lap pool, swam in the outdoors heated pool, went in/out of hot tubs (there were four or five all heated at different temps), rested in the steam room, rested in the dry sauna, rested in the eucalyptus inhalation room, rested and ate lunch in the "relaxation room," and went for a dip in the indoor mineral pool. So indulgent.

On Day 5, my last day, we drove to Invermere, British Columbia. Here we went to the hot springs, of course, where the waters are hot on one side and simply warm on the other.This is the simply warm side.

Since we were at a lower elevation, there was less snow on the ground here but, yikes, there was indeed ice on the deck (as I clearly remember because I had to stand on it to take the above picture).

And, lo and behold, the lifeguards were wearing sweatpants! Yes, sweatpants! Clearly not the best location for a scantily clad David Hasselhoff sighting.

On our way home, we stopped to enjoy the view. Wow, more mountains! Who knew? The only picture we did not take was of the "avalanche warning" sign.

Lastly, we paused briefly over the continental divide. I was in the back seat (i.e., west coast) and Margaret and Brian were in the front seat (i.e., east coast).

Alas, all good things must come to an end. For a brief moment in time, I had heaps of fun in the frigid air of Canada with my girlfriends from Australia and awesome Canadian hubby/kids!

Work Life Balance

You know you're overworked when:

1. Your son bursts into tears and tells you how much he misses you -- and you live with him
2. You meet a friend for a quick salad/glass of chardonnay at a restaurant in your hometown -- and you feel like you're on vacation 

Flickr image from John Lam

Oh, oh, oh, oh Wilco

What's on the docket this weekend?

Why a quick trip across the lake to Toronto with my girlfriend Yams to see Nick Lowe and Wilco. Hey, that rhymes! Oh, oh, oh, oh Nick Lowe.

Summer Vacation: Stop #2

Our second stop: Our nation's capital where we stayed at the Dupont Circle Hotel. I felt so Sydney Ellen Wade-ish! (Looove her.)

After we checked in, we relaxed, ate lunch in the groovy bar, watched the crowds walk by and, just as we were headed out to explore the city, Son #1 fell ill. Different son. Same illness? So the kids and Grannie hung for the afternoon as I walked over to my girlfriend/BFF Kim's yoga studio to meet her and her darling daughter. Later that night, my fabulous girlfriend Kristy came in from Northern VA and, due to the torrential rain, we had an overpriced, bland, nondescript dinner (followed by watery, bland martinis) just across the street at Kramerbooks and Afterwords Cafe as the lightening lit up the skies over the atrium in which we were dining. Scary and yet very cool.

The next day, we did many of the requisite kid-friendly things in town: walked from the Capitol to the Lincoln Memorial stopping at the WWII Memorial and Washington Monument along the way. (Long walk! Oppressive heat!) We ended our day of sightseeing at Son #1's favorite stop: The Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum, of course.

Madeline showing a strong proclivity toward her hippie parents' liberal bias.

Afternoon tea for some; dinner for others.

Cupcakes and chocolate croissants for breakfast at the Firehook bakery! Yum! All's fair game when traveling with Grannie. No need to use your hands. 

Riding on the metro . . .

Is that a monument in the distance or are you just glad to see us?

I have better pics of everyone under their favorite states at the WWII Memorial; however, this photo is my fave because it captures Son #1 clearly complaining about something that I'm, as usual, doing to annoy him!

Next stop: the beach. Amen. Amen.

Extreme Makeover: Weight Gain Edition

Last Saturday morning, I was in the locker room in the gym brushing my hair when Christine, one of my BFF's since childhood, came in. I said, "Hey!" and she, of course (always polite), said "Hi!" and kept walking. I continued, "By the way, I was thinking of going to the lake tonight and thought maybe I could pawn my kids off on you since you're driving down tomorrow." She stopped, turned around and said, "OMG, I didn't recognize you a minute ago."

(Note: She also asked, a moment later when discussing what to bring, "Do you like wine?")

Whaaaat? We've been friends for over 40 years. We see each other all of the time. I found it somewhat incredulous. (Answer: Yes, I like wine.)

On Sunday morning, I was drinking coffee on the front porch of my girlfriend Mary's main cottage and another friend from childhood, Anne (of previous post cigarette fame) with whom I had bunked the night before in the guest house, came over. She then asked me where I was.

Um, right here?

She said, "OMG, I thought you were somebody else." Really? In broad daylight? From a foot away? After having spent the entire night with me?

Later that afternoon, I was coming up the lawn from the lake and both girlfriends were in the hot tub. Anne spotted me and asked Christine, "Who is that walking up the hill?"

Christine felt vindicated. "See?! It's not just me."

Today, I'm sitting in a sausage dress with my buttons almost popping open encased in my own personal hell.

I guess the good news is that apparently no one will know it's me.

Mount Hope Cemetery

Today is Monday and I didn't go to work! Repeat: I didn't go to work!

Instead, I went for an early morning walk with my girlfriend Gretchen through Rochester's beautiful, hilly, gothic, moorish Mount Hope Cemetery. We admired the monuments, obelisks, mile high angels, wildly overrun plantation and pea-soupish ponds.

I love the hands on hearts, below, along with the skyward finger point. (Apparently that wasn't originated by hip hop performers and/or football players in the end zone. Who knew?)

 

We went to see the burial site of suffragette Susan B. Anthony . . . 

    

And the famous abolitionist Frederick Douglass . . .

And, of course, the sites of Gretchen's family and that of my hubby's grandparents (i.e., my kids' great grandparents) Link and Castleman below. It would have been our future grave site, as well, but we declined a few years ago and the MIL sold the plots. D'oh!

Rain Roll In

This song, from one of my favorite new artists, Eilen Jewell, (who is playing the Rochester International Jazz Fest on Friday night) goes out to my husband's friend Natasha who died last night.

Today is dark and rainy. And sad.

Natasha, we will miss your sweetness. The kindness of your soul. And your milkshakes.

With Love to Uncle Ed

Where do I begin?

With my Mother's Day overnight trip with my girlfriends to the spa at Mirbeau? Waiting in line just to gorge ourselves on steamers and shrimp kebabs at Doug's Fish Fry in Skaneateles? Sipping champagne cocktails with the Daytona Beach-like Moms Gone Wild crowd at the waterfall-fireplaced-grotto-like-outdoor hot tub? Trying to relax (with a pillow over my head) in the "quiet room" while some loud-mouthed chick told the whole room about her husband's celiac disease? Enjoying a fabulous but lengthy, three-hour dinner at the inn complete with capon magro (yummy lobster, shrimp, crab and capon crostini), venison tenderloin (delicious but so not a typical choice for me) and fork-fulls of my girlfriend's hummingbird cake (i.e., a hybrid, cream cheese frosted carrot/banana cake)? Waking up to a full clay body wrap treatment with head massage? Shopping in town the next day -- where timely Christmas music, including the Little Drummer Boy, played in the antique store? Coming home to the hammock and blowing off work for the day?

Where do I end?

With a visit from my mom's much loved, best friend from childhood, Joanne, and her husband John? With the, as always, wonderful barbecue at my sister's house? Or with Joanne carrying on a tradition that my Grandpa Jack established with our families many moons ago: handing my kids $$ as we left to go home? (They were so psyched.)

I guess a few days bookmarked on either end by friends from a) my childhood and b) my mom's childhood is a few days well spent. All in all, a great week with one major sadness thrown in the mix: my favorite uncle on my father's side, Ed, passed away in California. Truly heart wrenching. Our world lost a beautiful soul with sparkling eyes, an infectious laugh and a kind heart. He will be sorely missed.

Pink Ribbon Scars

In continuation of yesterday's morose musical theme, today's post is about another song that I heard last week that is also sad for me: the Smashing Pumpkin's Today.

In 1993, the summer when the hubby and I got married, friends Jack & Gisella (or as the priest who officiated their wedding called them, Gary & Regina) were planning to come our wedding from CO. Instead, Gisella had been experiencing some significant back pain and, when she went to the doctor, they discovered that her breast cancer had spread and she would be undergoing a new treatment that included, ultimately, a painful bone marrow transfer.

The big hit of that time, Today, will always remind me of the juxtaposition of my wedding and the sadness of Gisella's illness and death a handful of years later.

Today is the greatest
Day I've never known
Can't wait for tomorrow
I might not have that long

The last time that I saw her, my girlfriend DeeDee and I drove down from NYC to DC where Gisella lay in a coma in the hospital. Not at all how I would like to remember her. Instead, I picture us hanging out in the art studio at SU or meandering through the shops in Breckenridge. And I remember her to my kids often because she had a sweet habit of literally running and jumping into her bed every night like a little kid -- something that Son #2 likes to do, on occasion, too.

So that's how she's still with us today. Charming. Endearing. And missed.

Endless Summer

Thanks to one innocent Facebook post this morning, I've been listening to the Beach Boys all day. For the most part, they remind me of my childhood girlfriend Pam McColloch who lived up the street. In the pre-cellphone 1970s, we would spend nights chatting with each other over our walkie talkies while taking turns playing Beach Boys tunes on our turntables until the batteries (or our thumbs pressing the "speak" button) quickly wore out.

The song Sloop John B, however, reminds me of arriving at Day Hall, at Syracuse University, freshman year. My bestest friend Krissy and I requested rooms in the same dorm but asked not to be roommates so we could meet other people. On the day we arrived, there was a big dorm party with kegs out on the lawn (those were the days, huh!) and music blaring. I was so excited. Kris? Not so much. She sat on the front steps, crying and singing aloud to this song. "I feel so broke up; I wanna go home." Buzz kill!

Sake Mom

One of my best friends since the first grade came over for wine and cheese a few weeks ago. The kids, mainly Son #2, have a running gag with her where they pretend to drink too much (i.e., head back, fist to mouth, thumb to lips, pinkie in air), stagger around the room and then get behind the wheel of a car (i.e., two fists turning an invisible steering wheel) while making screeching tire noises. Very rude behavior from disrespectful children. Not to mention, completely undeserved. Thankfully, she laughs.

Son #2, our resident comedian, even coined a new nickname for her. In response to me calling her a "soccer mom," he stated, "More like a sake mom."

It'll be hard to live that one down.

My Eulogy

I just went through the 3.5 years of this blog and deleted most of my work-related rants. Why? Partly because I'm very appreciative of this job (which is also well documented) but mainly because it's hurtful. And, while my readers are limited to a few friends and family, I don't want to be that person who intentionally or unintentionally hurts someone's feelings. It amounted to 13 posts over the past 46 months (i.e., roughly one per quarter). In hindsight, not too bad, after all.

The other morning I had coffee with a headhunter who bills himself as a connector. He wanted to meet with me to discuss a business idea he's hatching. Somehow in the course of our conversation, he asked what I wanted said about me during my eulogy. Nothing business-related, I assured him. (Man, could she produce. Have you seen her spreadsheets?)

The topic came up again later that same day when I had lunch with my favorite pastor. He said it's a topic in the bestseller and major snooze fest (my add), The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. To live a noteworthy life, you basically start with the end in mind. For example, he said that he hopes people will always recognize him as someone who truly cared for others. Nice.

But what's my end goal? The question keeps rolling and rolling around with the tumbleweed in my brain.

Yesterday, my mom and I went to my uncle's funeral. His eulogy was centered around his larger-than-life personality, ability to live life to its fullest and can-do personality. He focused his approach to life around a single question: Is it the right thing to do? and, if the answer was "yes," he would say, "then do it."

I have no such defining principles. Or, if I do, I'm not sure they're earmarked as mine and/or shared readily with others.

What would others say at my funeral? She was so busy, I barely saw her anymore? That probably would not be stated aloud. Maybe people would say that I'm nice. Or sometimes funny. A good mom. All of these are good things but they're not strong differentiators.

Who am I? More importantly, what positive mark should I be attempting to imprint on my children? I don't have the answer yet but I'm glad to be posing the question.

Destined for Stardom

Made it through a whirlwind weekend and now need a rest but, alas, I'm back in the saddle again.

Friday night, I worked until after eight and then took the kiddos, while I was in a state of utter exhaustion, to see local teen band 441. These talented kids write and play mostly originals (except for some notable songs like Jet's Are You Gonna Be My Girl?) and the crowd is chock full of youngsters dancing and holding giant poster board signs. I felt like I was at the filming of teevee's fictitious Big Time Rush except that people actually like 441. Band aside, I loved watching a) the break dancing elementary school boys and b) the pseudo-hipster parents rockin' out (i.e., a pathetic mirror to my own aging soul).

After taking the boys to swimming on Saturday, I finally made it with my girlfriend Gretchen to the George Eastman House to see the Taking Aim: Unforgettable Rock 'n' Roll Photographs Selected By Graham Nash exhibit just before its run in Rochester ended. I'm so glad I made it! As Gretchen said, every museum should have The Clash playing in the background. I couldn't agree more. The photos were fascinating. I even liked the quotes on the walls . . .

I want to get a real camera and spend a year recreating all of the photos with my kids and girlfriends. I think I'll start with my favorite Neko Case picture (taken by Alice Wheeler); but, it'll star me and my boyfriends -- when they're old enough to drive.

It was nice having a girlie day. Shopping at the Parkleigh Pharmacy (buying nothing), lounging at Starbucks on Monroe, looking for fun stuff at Archimage and finally buying a delicious chocolate ganache cake for Grannie Annie's birthday at Goodness Cakes.

On our way home, we stopped to take more pics of the snow monsters. Note the one from last week is now fully colored and in the process of eating someone!

Mystery Solved

I ran into a friend a week or two ago who I had last seen at a Christmas party where he had clearly tied one on. He said, "My memory is a little fuzzy but I didn't forget you jumping rope with the Christmas lights." Say what?

At a wake this afternoon, I finally heard the story. Two of my wilder girlfriends, who usually wear ornament earrings and blinking necklaces/rings/etc., were standing together at the holiday party and everyone kept commenting on how understated they were this year. (The holiday tiara wasn't enough apparently.) Finally, one grabbed all of the Christmas lights and wrapped them around her body just to get people to shut up. When she couldn't mingle against the wall all night, she then had her friends trying to find an extension cord. Somehow, as it does, it turned into a full-on, double dutch, jump rope contest indoors until someone landed on a bulb and it shattered. 

So I have to ask myself: why do I always leave too early?

Fauxbriety

On behalf of a girlfriend who I love and who will remain nameless, I just coined a new word: fauxbriety.

Definition: "Even though I'm swerving all over the road and catapulting my car over snowbanks, I swear I haven't had a drink in weeks."

She claims it was a combination of cold medicine and queasiness so, unless it happens again, I'll have to take her word for it. To the best of my knowledge, it's never happened before so the benefit of the doubt seems to be in order here. In the meantime, I simply plan to stay clear of her car.

Taxi!

Update: So much for being proud of myself. I just Googled my new word and it's been on Urban Dictionary since 2008. Darn it all. 

Love and Other Things

Over the weekend, I discovered that:

1. A single martini feels much stronger when you subsequently have to navigate an airport. But cocktails with girlfriends trump more rational decisions any day.
2. JetBlue still doesn't have its act together. Their computer system somehow assigned more than one person per seat on our 10:40 p.m. flight to the ROC so they gave up and shouted to the boarding passengers "ignore your seat assignment and just grab the first seat that's open." Unable to bear the thought of a night in Queens, lil' ole alcohol-bolstered me forged ahead taking no prisoners. To quote Ted Nugent, it was a free-for-all. And I won. (Clasped hands raised in trophy pose.)
3. Playgrounds are very, very slippery when covered with snow. Dangerous yet heaps o' fun. Note to my vast readership of playground equipment developers: you should conduct in situ research during winter conditions to avoid lawsuits. Seriously. Even the wood chips underfoot were frozen. 
4. Snow covered slides will launch you (or in this case, me) into the air like a human cannonball.
5. Landing on your back is more palatable when dressed like Nanook of the North.
6. Lastly, ten year old boys have girlfriends. And they kiss. And use the word "love." They also share these details openly with their friend's mom (i.e., me) over hot soup. 

Photo Per Day #26: The Pub

Went out to meet my niece, in town from DC, for a drink tonight at the pub. Thankfully my girlfriend came with me because my niece didn't show for another 1.5 hours. So we went home. Beforehand, we had these.