Tuesday, March 11, 2008

There's a Monster in My Pants

Dear Eliot -

Why? Why did you have to become our two-faced, corruption-busting, whoring governor?

Yes, we all have our sins and failures. Yes, call girls need lovin' too. Yes, people are tempted into extra-marital affairs all the time. (What else could explain the phenomenal success of the Jerry Springer show? Or the scandal-induced sales of People magazine thanks to people like Brad Pitt?)

But, unlike the stars in Hollywood or the slack-jawed yokels found across America, we trusted you.

Why couldn't you keep it in your pants for just a few short years?

Sincerely, Confused in Rochester

P.S. $5,500 per hour? Tax-free? By working one hour per week, one can bring home close to $300K annually? Why doesn't anyone tell aspiring young MBAs this before they incur massive debt, mortgages, wrinkles and flab?

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Amen, Laura.

Heck, if I'd known I could make that much for a party in Eliot Spitzer's pants, I would have flown to DC.

Pranayama mama said...

On your private jet!

Anonymous said...

It all makes me think of "Dave Chop"!!!

Pranayama mama said...

I know! I almost wrote that in my response to you. Even world renowned spiritual gurus have their moments of personal degradation . . . if your high-class hooker/college roommate identified him correctly. You need to write a book, my friend.

Anonymous said...

Actually, I think my friend does!